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The Gift of Desperation
Desperation is the lonely place we all go when we feel abandoned by happiness and hope. It is a state where misery hangs in the air so thick and heavy that you can’t see anything else. For most of us, it’s a level of pain that is to be avoided at all costs.
For someone who has spent years trudging through this swampland, a simple reductionist definition just will not do. There are far too many layers, too many manifestations to stuff them into a tidy little pastry box of classification.
So instead, I offer examples:
When you hint at the “S word” to express your pain and a worried therapist takes notice. When suddenly there’s a knock at the door, and your eyes widen in terror as the peephole reveals 8 NYPD and EMTs cramped into the tiny hall outside your apartment. When this “safety check” takes you to a place where shoe laces are not allowed.
When you get called into a surprise meeting in the “crying room” (the office without windows). When your stomach sickens with fear, depression and anxiety as you hear 10 years of tireless, dedicated service erased by sterile, robotic HR-speak. A decade of insults from abusive clients. 10 years walking on eggshells to avoid Machiavellian knife fights. Poof…Just sign this legally binding…
